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Healing At Midlife

After years of crying gallons

Of biting lips hard to hush

I started to heal

With those countless moments

Both late nights and early mornings

Of dealing with the haunting phantom

That used to inhabit within

I was near death

Fatally wounded by self doubt

And self inflicted torture

But my insolence saved me

Now mended and recovered

No longer isolating myself from the rest world

No more bouts of cursing the heavens

For permitting this drama of an odd existence

I have been nursed back to the heights

After coming out of the tightly sealed closet

My inner spirit began to radiate

Emitting new found bravery

Vibrating in my own pace

With most things sorted out

Taking out the clutter

Everything fell in order

Even lady luck became cooperative

Unclenching her once shut fists

At a certain age, I came to be indifferent

Detached from biting hostility all around

Without question there is a possible future

May it be happiness or remote intimacy

Yet this is not the final purpose

I now possess undying faith in the beyond

At the brink of the old

I have at long last stepped out

To reclaim the footsteps

Of a man preferring to walking in the high

Bolted from my self declared separation

I am forbidden no longer

Dictating the pace of gliding in this generation

Intolerant of false humanity

I have learned to wage war

And disregard ideas of those shallow and trite

Regardless of what may be said

In the absence approval of I have faith

Wisdom overtook me in midlife

I have rightfully earned this right

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